Defining the word "friend" with co-workers

I had a chance to ask five of my co-workers the Questions yesterday. But I only managed to ask two of them two questions.

A bunch of us went out to lunch, and as we sat there munching our burgers I realized I had a great opportunity to start a discussion. Unfortunately we were just about ready to leave, so I bided my time.

I rode back to the office with my boss and one other co-worker, Leila, and decided I’d just ask them the Questions along the way. But I had to wait just a little longer. As we walked toward the car, I looked back to see Leila, the driver, digging through her purse.

“I can’t find my keys,” she said.

A couple of seconds later and she realized what she’d done.

“They’re in the car.”

It would be the third time I’d used AAA in the past eight months. And I’m not even a member. Last August, I’d been swimming at a lake in Port Orchard and locked my keys in the car. My friend James (not the guy in my previous post) called AAA to break in and get me on my way. Then, about a month and a half ago, I was in Bellevue driving a Mini owned by a friend of a friend and I’d run over a curb and popped a tire. After discovering the donut was also flat, another friend called AAA to tow us home. But that’ll be a whole other blog post, later.

Now here I was in the parking lot of the Filling Station in Kingston, waiting for someone to come and break into Leila’s car. I kept thinking I should ask the Questions while we waited, but I couldn’t find a good opening. I needed a segue. 

Finally, on the drive home I found my opening. As we drove past Emu Topsoil, my boss mentioned that the soil was fertilized with emu poop. I jumped in.

“This has nothing to do with emu poop. Did I tell you guys about the blog project I’ve been working on?”

Nice segue, eh?

My boss pretended to plug her ears. “I don’t know you have a blog outside of work.”

“Yeah, I have a blog that has nothing to do with my job. But that’s OK, right?”

“Yeah,” my boss replied. And she told us the URL for hers.

I could only think of the first two Questions since I didn’t have my notes with me. But I got some good answers.

My boss came up with the best definition of the word “friend” that I’ve heard so far: “A friend is someone who you spend time with willingly.”

I’d agree. It’s a little broad, but it’s narrower than Facebook’s definition, which appears to be: A friend is someone whose name you click on and who decides, “what the hell, I’ll return the click.”

We all agreed that Facebook is a nice tool for staying connected with people we’d like to spend time with but often can’t.

Leila commented on the fact that we all have friends who are not close by, but whom we nevertheless feel close to. And I’m paraphrasing here, because I’m not used to taking mental notes. I normally carry a notepad with me when I need to remember exact quotes. She said, more eloquently but with the same sentiment, “That’s the thing about good friends, no matter how far apart you are, it doesn’t matter; you’re still close.”

Speaking of close friends (am I the master of the segue, or what?), I had beers that night with a couple of guys I’d consider to be in my “inner circle" of friends. It turned into a long, deep conversation. I think we solved world hunger. OK, maybe it didn’t get that deep. But it was good, and I’ll tell you about it in my next post.