A Few Things I Learned in Hawaii

I’m wrapping up a 12-day stay in Hawaii, on the island of Kauai. I’m privileged enough to say this because my girlfriend’s parents were generous enough to take me, her, her brother, his wife, and their son on this amazing mid-winter getaway. (And my parents were kind enough to get me a plane ticket as a Christmas gift.) While it’s been a relaxing trip and a chance to escape the tedium of the work week back home, I haven’t shut my brain off entirely. Here below are a few things I’ve learned--and some I’ve relearned or been reminded of--during this trip.

1. The tropics are awesome, especially when it’s freezing back home.
2. But sometimes the weather in Hawaii sucks too.
3. Shave ice > sno cones
4. Puka Dog < Puka Dog hype
5. Ziplining is a helluva lotta fun.
6. This place is hard to leave.

Sunset vista from our deck. (Elisa Michelson photo)

7. If you work at a surf shop, you can almost pull off a bright blonde mustache. Almost.
8. Pop cans here have a weird shape.
9. Tahitian dancing > Hawaiian dancing. (Sorry)
10. No matter how much you cheer, how many times you pee or hold it in, how you arrange the furniture, what sort of pre-game rituals you do, and where you turn the label of your beer bottle, you as a fan on the couch cannot affect the outcome of your NFL team’s playoff games.
11. There’s always next season.

Getting ready to unearth the pig at a luau.

12. The chicken crossed the road because Hurricane Iniki destroyed her coop and set her and thousands of her relatives running wild all over this island.
13. All the parking spaces on Kauai are unusually narrow.
14. Hawaii has a “Forbidden Island” next to Kauai, called Niihau.
15. I need to figure out how to get to “The Forbidden Island”
16. I need to come back and visit some of the other Hawaiian islands too.
17. Hawaii generally kicks booty.

Look! A peacock!